Thursday, October 29, 2009

Cole's Top Halloween Quotes and Moments

Courtesy of IT Guy, Mortgage Guy (umm...refinance your almost short sale guy), Paramedic Guy that makes me blush, Costume Clerk, Amazing Assistant and other general Halloween characters.....

1. "Did you decide to be cute or a whore for Halloween? Either way, wear glitter. We like glitter." 
2. "There's a Minnie Mouse costume I'd like you put you in. "(said with an I-want-to-take-the-Minnie-costume-off-you-grin) 
3. "Oh, be a whore.  Please be whore. "  Not your typical going to get Starbucks conversation, no. 
4. "I need a sexy bunny tail on aisle three."  She said the phrase all men feel when they walk down the canned food aisle.
5. "You can see right through this!!!"  To her boyfriend as she debated buying the toga dress. I think he really isn't too concerned about coverage.
6. "You either have to be super slutty or really cute.  There's no in between.  And smell good.  And have someone do your makeup.   That's the only way to win the contest."  I do smell good and I do wear makeup.  It's not my fault he sees me at the end of a brutal work day. 
7. "So, what's your daughter going to be for Halloween?"  She continued to shop in the consignment store with me and said, "I'm a good Christian mom...she's going to be a slutty vampire."
8. fff...ty year old men?  Even if you really want to...don't go to the lil bo peep costume section and gaze longingly, alone.  Triple Creepy.
9. "Used gas money to buy my Halloween costume. What's new? You'll have to drive to me for the next week. Ask for The Grecian Goddess."
10. My assistant, "Yah, you probably shouldn't be a whore. You work here."  More profound than she knows.
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