Sunday, November 15, 2009

Sunday School and Pissing

Lessons Learned on a Mini LA Adventure
Courtesy of The Brazilian who made me so mad with his call today that I got in the car and headed....West!

1. Stop, breathe and watch. 
Today, I saw four little kids that were amazing.  They went into the restroom to wash up before lunch and had such a sense of the adults around them.  They said "pleases" and "thank yous" and helped each other reach the water and the soap and held the door for me when they didn't need to do that. 

Some kids are so in their head that they wouldn't dare think of another person.  Some adults are.  Sometimes I am.  I was terribly, terribly impressed.  Rather than rushing and wanting them to hurry through eights hand...I took a step back and just...watched.  It was lovely and sweet and a nice little on-my-way-to-LA moment.

2. Don't shame people.
Before I left Orange County, I stopped to put gas in the car and walked inside Chevron to get Evian.  (commence with eye rolling now.)  Screw you...I like the bottle.  Anyway, no one was behind the counter so I waited and then HE came out.  The customer service guy that was working on cleaning the bathroom.  With the cleaning-the-bathroom-gloves on.  Sure, those are the gloves he should be wearing and I'm so thankful he's doing his job and keeping the restroom nice and clean for customers.  Did he have to grab my pretty pink and white Evian water bottle with the bathroom cleaning gloved hand and ring it up?  I could have gone all gangsta on him.  I could have made him feel embarrassed for this BREACH in SERVICE!  What's the point?  He's a hard working man earning a living and simply doing his job.  And it's my job as a pre middle age woman to have an ounce of grace and simply smile, walk away nicely and tell him to have a good day. 

I left the Evian Toilet Water behind with the smile. 

3. A Line is Just a #$%@'n Line
I made it to Phillipe's in downtown LA for my favorite sandwich in the whole world.  And unfortunately, a new Metro line opened today that drops directly into my sandwich shop.  Damn. The lines are long.  You have two options.  You can stand in line and make friends or you can piss and moan.  The people behind me decided to piss and moan. 

I don't think they are having a lot of sex.

No one is out to get you.  The line didn't form to ruin your day.  The line didn't plan weeks in advance to make you Sunday Unhappy.  It's just a line.  A little itty bitty long ass line and sure, it sucks but you're going to be okay.  It's a sandwich after all.  If you really are in dire straights then maybe the line isn't for you.  So, don't go all CSI over who is moving to what line and "so and so cut in front and did you just see that???".  Let it happen.  It can be kinda organic.  Really.  It's a line with people and the people matter more than the #$%@'n line.  They do.

4. Nobody Wants to Piss Next to the Free Air/Water Machine
I was driving on the 10, my favorite freeway because I know all the bumps and grooves when all of a sudden I didn't know all of the bumps and grooves.  Having the panic brain of a single woman I naturally assumed: my car is going to explode all four tires in under 20 seconds.  I moved to the slow lane and exited near the Convention Center. 

A gas station?  A gas station?  Ahh....and I find one and check on the tires and one is a little low but not devastatingly low so I pull up next to the Free Air/Water Machine of which there are none in Orange County and start to fill 'er up. 

And it hits smells like urine.  And I roll my eyes with a big Orange County eye roll and think about how much I love where I live in a big Orange County way.  And drive off.

Minutes hits me.  No one wants to piss next to the Free Air/Water Machine.  Who wants to do that?  It's out of necessity that we do those things.  Sometimes it's out of survival.  And I'm instantly mad at my Orange County self for forgetting in a breath it could be me that is without a home, without somewhere to sleep and without somewhere to go to the restroom in private with a bit of dignity.

I'm a pre middle age idiot sometimes.  I'm glad I realize it sooner than later most times.

Lots of talk about about Chevron restrooms and urine on Evian bottles and washing hands in restrooms and pissing on streets, huh?  Sometimes Sunday School is like that.

Much love....Cole
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